


Forever

by iatethebiscuit



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Belle death, Papa!Rumple, Post-Beauty, post 7x04
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-29
Updated: 2017-10-29
Packaged: 2019-01-26 03:00:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12547340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iatethebiscuit/pseuds/iatethebiscuit
Summary: Rumple and Gideon have to deal with losing Belle. Angsty post-Beauty fic.





	Forever

The bed was empty without Belle. Rumplestiltskin was exhausted, but he couldn’t sleep. Belle was gone. That was the one thought in his mind overshadowing all else. His Belle was gone. Somehow he had forgotten how fragile she was, even if he had taken over making tea because her hands shook too much. He had forgotten about her mortality despite the fact that she could barely move in the morning because of her stiff joints. None of that mattered to him. She was his Belle, she had promised him forever. They hadn’t gotten forever.

It had taken him three hours to regain his mind enough to call their son after Belle passed. Gideon had left immediately, but the journey took at least a day. Rumple had washed his wife carefully, read to her, laid her to rest in bed where she could be sleeping. He kept expecting her to wake up, for her lips to curl into that beautiful smile of hers, but she just stayed still.

Gideon arrived later. The clock told him it was evening, but Rumple hadn’t slept. He’d stayed with Belle, held her hand, prayed for her to come back to him. He’d crushed his son in a tight hug when he arrived, held his hand as he saw his mother’s body, and held him as his shoulders shook with sobs. They’d cried together for hours. They didn’t need to say anything. They knew. It was just the two of them now.

At some point Rumple had realized Gideon needed to eat, so he’d dragged himself to the kitchen to make some toast. Belle’s cup was still on the counter, a small layer of tea in it, long cold. Somehow it made him break all over again. She had left a hole in his being, and it seemed that he no longer existed without her.

They had buried her two days later. Gideon had carved a cross to use as a headstone while Rumple dug a grave. They buried her in her favourite dress, her hands clasped around their chipped teacup. It seemed fitting that it stayed with her forever. Maybe some part of him hoped it would bring her peace wherever she’d gone. He’d expected the dirt falling on her make-shift coffin to do something to him, but it didn’t. There was still only emptiness.

Gideon, their boy, now a strong man, had been the one to get up and say they needed sleep. Everything about him reminded Rumple of Belle. It broke his heart and gave him hope at the same time.

He’d gotten under the covers on Belle’s side of the bed. Her scent still lingered on the sheets. Something that was distinctly her, but had gotten muddled with the smell of age over the years. He’d thought her just as beautiful as when he met her. He didn’t cry. There were no more tears. His fingers stroked over the warm cotton, remembering how she’d always slid her hand towards his if they fought just before bed. The way she pressed her cold feet to his legs to warm herself, the way she nestled her head against his chest.

The sound of the door opening made him look up. He half expected to see his wife walk in, but Gideon’s tear-streaked face appeared. His heart broke for his son. He’d loved his mother more than anything, and it was too soon for him to have to let her go.

“I know.” Rumple whispered softly, folding the covers back so Gideon could climb in with him. With a sob, the young man slid into his father’s arms. Rumple held him tightly, kissing his hair. They were going through the same thing. He’d gotten to spend years with Belle, ages of quiet contentment, while Gideon had been out finding his happiness. To him, everything had gone by so fast. They had asked him, before, if he wanted them to come live with him, but he saw how happy they were. He had sacrificed his time with his parents so they could be happy. He was the bravest man Rumple had ever met.

“It’s going to be okay.” He whispered, his voice broken. He didn’t believe it himself right now, but he had gone through enough loss to know that the pain dulled with time. “She loved you, Gideon. She was so incredibly proud of you. Both of us are.”

He felt Gideon nod against his chest. Rumple was consumed by grief, but he needed to be here for his son. Belle would want him to be strong, so he would be. He stroked his son’s back, holding him close. He remembered him crawling into bed with them in the mornings when he was young, his hair still messy from sleep, telling them about where he’d gone in his dreams. More often than not, that would become their new destination. He remembered the joy on Belle’s face as she watched him play. Gideon was the best thing they’d made. The pain of losing Bae would always be with him, but watching Gideon grow up made it a little easier.

“I love you, papa.” Gideon mumbled quietly. “I didn’t tell mama enough.”

Rumple closed his eyes. “She knew. Of course she knew. She knew we loved her, Gid. And she loved us in return.”

There was silence for a little while. They needed time. Both of them. There was so much they still wanted to do, and now they wouldn’t get to do any of it. He wouldn’t let his son go ever again.

“Did she suffer?”

“Oh, son.” Rumple whispered, crushing him to himself. The question brought tears to his own eyes again. “It was very quick. I don’t think she was in pain. She was strong until the end. I held her hand the entire time.”

“Good.” Gideon said. He sniffled, and Rumple stroked his hair. They both understood the indescribable pain that came with what had happened. “She really loved you, papa.”

Rumple’s cheeks were wet, he realized. When exactly he had started crying, he didn’t know. Their son, their beautiful boy, had given them their happy ending. “I know.” He whispered. Belle had never hesitated to let him know how much he meant to her. Belle and Gideon were the best things to ever happen to him.

He held Gideon as his body started shaking with sobs again. He would always be there. He couldn’t let their son lose his father too. He owed that to Belle.

“What do we do now?” Gideon asked after a long time.

Rumple thought the question over for a little while. “We go on with our lives.” He said. “She’d want us to. You go back to the academy, follow your dreams. I’m going with you. There is nothing for me here anymore.”

Their home would be their sanctuary. Somewhere to go when times got tough and they needed Belle. But he had to be with their son. He couldn’t miss another moment. He was all he had.

“She’s waiting for you, isn’t she?”

Rumple nodded, stroking his hair. “Yeah.” He said with a sigh. “I think she is. Wherever she is, she’s with her mother. She’s with Bae.”

Gideon pulled away slightly, smiling sadly at his father. God, he was beautiful. How he and Belle had ever made anything so perfect was beyond him. Gideon had always been Belle’s pride and joy.

“You need to find her, papa. You’ve been looking for peace for so long. I can help you. We’ll find a way to break your curse.”

Rumple smiled, more tears dripping from his eyes. He wanted nothing more than to see her again. “But what about you?” He asked in a breathless voice.

“I’ll be okay.” Gideon said. Rumple pulled his son close again. He was strong, stronger than Rumple had ever been. He was so proud.

“I’ll find her.” He whispered. “But we need to mourn her first. I need to make sure you’ll be okay without me. You’ve already lost your mother, I’m not leaving you until you’re ready.”

Gideon nodded, and from the way his arms tightened around Rumple’s chest, he knew he wasn’t letting go anytime soon. “I love you, son.” He whispered quietly. “I know she’s still watching over us. She’ll never really leave you.”

This was what Belle would have wanted. A quiet goodbye, full of love. She had meant more to her husband and son than she could ever know, and Rumple would never stop fighting for her. You never gave up on something worth fighting for. He smiled softly. He would find her again. After all, she’d promised him forever.


End file.
